Unhappy . . . And ok?

I’m unhappy.

If you couldn’t tell, go back and read the post from Monday.

I am stressed to the maximum. You know what though? It is perfectly ok. See, somewhere along the lines of trying to keep a lid on this ADHD madness I think I’ve become scared of my own humanity. I have wrapped myself up, bound so tightly in the ropes of my own expectations that I have become neurotic.

Let’s look at this rationally for a moment:

I’m not working.
I have expenses.
My new job doesn’t begin until the end of the month.

Some Credit May Be In Order

Who WOULDNT be unhappy in that situation? All I’m saying is that maybe I (we) should give ourselves a little credit once in a while. People with mental illness are not weak people. Weak people cannot war with their own minds and come out on the other side. So if we can accept our strength, can we accept certain emotions as ordinary for us and not allow them to cause us to panic?

I’ll give you an example.

For the month I didn’t get out of bed. I TOTALLY got out of bed. I ate, I slept, I bathed. The worst thing that happened was I got behind on my laundry. I didn’t spend impulsively, I didn’t act out.

This is huge. Why?

It means that I’ve learned to avoid situations that will hurt me when I’m down. That is a victory.

Celebrate With Caution

When you are depressed, every victory is one to be acknowledged. We certainly spend enough time ruminating over our losses, let’s celebrate something good. That doesn’t mean you shouldn’t still look out for when it becomes a problem.

Here are five trouble spots to look out for when depression and ADHD combine:

* Substance abuse: alcohol, tobacco, other drugs are all more tempting when we are feeling low. This combined with lowered inhibitions could make for a bad scenario
* Overspending: Impulsivity has done a number on my wallet more times than I care to admit. Nothing soothes the savage beast like some new makeup or a couple skeins of yarn (remember when crochet vegetables were ruining my life?)
* Irritability: If you are upset because you are depressed and you curse your whole family out, they will be upset with you. Especially grandma.
* Promiscuity: We’re all grown folks. Everyone has been down in the dumps (or been dumped) and wound up somewhere they may not have gone otherwise. Beware people offering “gifts” when you’re feeling vulnerable.
* Apathy/Procrastination: Depression tells you not to care. Procrastination says you didn’t want to do it anyway. Three weeks later your living space has been reduced to take out containers and dirty laundry. Avoid this as much as possible.

It is alright to be unhappy.

It’s alright to be impulsive.

We just need to learn to curtail these behaviors that can bring us so much pain and regret later. If you fall into some of these traps? It’s ok. We all do. Fix what you can fix, and learn for the next time. You do not have to panic every time you’re unhappy. You are in control. Trust yourself.
Until next time,

Ren?

P. S.

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“Purple Vortex” by Jonathan Gross is licensed under CC BY-ND

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