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Paying the Price for Self-Sacrifice
Self-sacrifice has a high cost. Unless you’re from a different planet (in that case, welcome), you have seen The Hunger Games. I loved these movies, and my favorite scene is still when Katniss throws herself into the games to save her sister. When she screams “I volunteer as tribute”? That’s some serious girl power. It makes a big statement about love and self-sacrifice. It’s beautiful.
Having said that, people: we don’t live in The Hunger Games. If you do, call me. That’s a whole different topic; we need to talk. I’m here for you.
Why did I find it necessary to point the obvious out? Because we are all walking around here falling on our swords. We “volunteer as tribute” constantly. It is critical to our well-being that we learn how to stop doing this.
What if I’m NOT Self-Sacrificing?
Now, I hear some of you dissenters in the back, telling me I’m wrong about you. Fair enough, I don’t want to falsely accuse anyone. Let’s see if you fit any of these criteria:
– Ever help a relative move when you didn’t have time?
– Have you lost a night’s sleep to the PTA’s demands for baked goods?
– Listened to your friend gripe about their crazy spouse for hours on end when you really needed a night to decompress?
– Gotten in over your head and majorly burnt out?
Here’s where we go wrong:
- People pleasing – It’s not your job to make everyone happy. We get into these cycles where we feel like we need to be of service to every human we encounter. We hear their sob story, our hearts melt, and before you know it, we are doing things we have absolutely no business doing. I’m not suggesting you stop having any concern for your fellow man because we need that. I AM suggesting you learn when to say no. That includes: when you are too tired to help when you are too busy to help, and when you are too broke to help. Anything that would cause you a major inconvenience is something you need to evaluate carefully before committing to helping.
- Underestimation of the task before you– Have an accurate idea of what you’re agreeing to before you say yes. There have been many times where I thought I was agreeing to one thing and actually agreed to another. The rate of this happening goes WAY up when I am distracted, so try not to agree to anything you can’t give two minutes of your full attention. That’s how you wind up doing something you absolutely DETEST for no particular reason.
- Getting caught up in emotion– Guilt or excitement have gotten me into more trouble than I care to admit
Stop volunteering as tribute. You’re not the mocking jay, the Messiah, the chosen one, or the boy who lived. I’m not suggesting that you don’t help others, but what help are you really if you are overwhelmed from self-sacrifice and you can’t get anything accomplished for yourself? That’s not helping us. Let somebody else volunteer. Take a nap instead.
Until next time,
P. S. – I found you a cookie recipe, you might need it. The PTA is merciless. Also, Pin this post!