[et_pb_section admin_label=”Header” background_image=”https://blackgirllostkeys.jermaineyoung.com/wp-content/uploads/2016/12/freemage-7048568277_d3d1e2fd89_o.jpg” transparent_background=”off” allow_player_pause=”off” inner_shadow=”off” parallax=”off” parallax_method=”off” padding_mobile=”off” make_fullwidth=”off” use_custom_width=”off” width_unit=”on” make_equal=”off” use_custom_gutter=”off” collapsed=”off”][et_pb_row admin_label=”row” make_fullwidth=”off” use_custom_width=”off” width_unit=”on” use_custom_gutter=”off” padding_mobile=”off” allow_player_pause=”off” parallax=”off” parallax_method=”off” make_equal=”off” parallax_1=”off” parallax_method_1=”off” parallax_2=”off” parallax_method_2=”off” column_padding_mobile=”on”][et_pb_column type=”1_3″][/et_pb_column][et_pb_column type=”2_3″][et_pb_divider admin_label=”Divider” color=”#ffffff” show_divider=”off” height=”200″ divider_style=”solid” divider_position=”top” hide_on_mobile=”on” locked=”on”] [/et_pb_divider][et_pb_text admin_label=”Title” background_layout=”light” text_orientation=”left” max_width=”620px” text_font=”PT Sans||||” text_font_size=”72″ text_text_color=”#ffffff” use_border_color=”off” border_color=”#ffffff” border_style=”solid” custom_margin=”0px||0px|” text_line_height=”1.1em” text_font_size_last_edited=”on|tablet” text_font_size_tablet=”52″]

Anxiety: Trust Issues

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21

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NOVEMBER, 2016

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Trust
Stress
Anxiety

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Dealing with it

I think I’ve figured out what my problem really is. For months, I’ve lived life like a zombie. I’ve been depressed, I’ve been overwhelmed and over-thought. To be frank: Anxiety has been kicking my ass.

 

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Those of you who have known me for a while know I have a hard time deciding on favorites; you know like a favorite movie, song, actor, etc. if I had to narrow it down though, I’d say one of my favorite movies ever is Willy Wonka and the Chocolate factory. The original one with Gene Wilder and little people. Don’t bring that Johnny Depp stuff around my way. It was alright, it just isn’t the same. I like my Oompa Loompas with orange skin and green hair.

[/et_pb_text][/et_pb_column][/et_pb_row][et_pb_row admin_label=”Big Photo Set” make_fullwidth=”off” use_custom_width=”off” width_unit=”on” use_custom_gutter=”off” custom_padding=”50px|||” padding_mobile=”on” allow_player_pause=”off” parallax=”off” parallax_method=”off” make_equal=”off” parallax_1=”off” parallax_method_1=”off” column_padding_mobile=”on” custom_padding_tablet=”17px|||” custom_padding_last_edited=”on|tablet” collapsed=”off”][et_pb_column type=”4_4″][et_pb_image admin_label=”Big Pic” src=”https://blackgirllostkeys.jermaineyoung.com/wp-content/uploads/2016/12/freemage-7658824292_1f8807bd7b_o.jpg” show_in_lightbox=”off” url_new_window=”off” use_overlay=”off” animation=”fade_in” sticky=”on” align=”left” force_fullwidth=”off” always_center_on_mobile=”on” use_border_color=”off” border_color=”#ffffff” border_style=”solid”] [/et_pb_image][et_pb_text admin_label=”Source” background_layout=”light” text_orientation=”left” text_text_color=”#363636″ use_border_color=”off” border_color=”#ffffff” border_style=”solid” text_font=”PT Serif||on||” text_font_size=”16″ text_line_height=”1em” custom_margin=”20px||0px|”]

Image courtesy of flickr.com.

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Image courtesy flickr.com

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Title: 15/52 “haywire”

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For those of you who’ve never had the pleasure, let me introduce you to anxiety. Anxiety steals your peace. Anxiety steals your sleep. Anxiety twists phrases, intentions and emotions into a rope and binds your feet with it, leaving it in a bow you are too terrified to untie.

Anxiety puts you on a treadmill with ever increasing speed and convinces you that running faster will get you somewhere. Exhausted, you run and run, praying a solution will find you. The emergency stop is within your reach, but you’re never quite certain that pushing it will give you rest.

 

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“I thought I was missing something. I thought I had lost my edge. My confidence. My direction. Here’s what it was: I stopped trusting myself.”

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I thought I was missing something. I thought I had lost my edge. My confidence. My direction. Here’s what it was: I stopped trusting myself. Simply, factually, I stopped trusting me. I had (have) trust issues.

This sounds esoteric and hippy dippy I know, but hear me out. When you doubt your capability to make a rational decision about your own life, you force yourself to look for answers elsewhere. Those answers usually come from the thoughts and opinions of other people.

No matter how well meaning someone else can be, they can never give you the desires of your heart. Nobody else knows what gives you your spark like you do. Nobody else can understand you like you can. Nobody else knows what keeps you up at night, dreaming. So we flit around from person to person attempting to get what only we can give to ourselves. It leaves us frustrated and confused. It makes us drain our loved ones of precious energy and causes us to cling too tightly to them.
I challenge you to remind yourself of who you are: no, really. Step outside of yourself. Grab a mirror, grab a pen. Look at yourself objectively. Leave your past failings in the past for five minutes and look at you.

 

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Image courtesy giphy.com

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You thought you would never make it to where you are, but you’re reading these words.

You thought you’d never survive what hurt you, but take a deep breath.

Do you feel that?

That’s you being alive.

What is there not to trust from a person who despite all the terrible things that life throws your way, continues?

It’s time to untie the rope. It’s time to stop the treadmill. You know what’s best for you, and you’ve always known. If you fail, you have a precedent for knowing that you will survive it. It’s as sure as the air in your lungs.

Let go of the trust issues.

Just try it.

Until next time,

René

P. S. Here are some images for you to pin to your favorite Pinterest Board!

Could the problem be that we don't trust ourselves?  | Black Girl, Lost Keys. Could the problem be that we don't trust ourselves?  | Black Girl, Lost Keys. Could the problem be that we don't trust ourselves?  | Black Girl, Lost Keys.

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Nailing It On The Head With
Free Internet Advertising

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MOTIVATION

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Believing Is The Absence
Of Doubt

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TRAVEL

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Big Savings On Gas
While You Travel

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2 thoughts on “Anxiety: Trust Issues

  1. Not really related to anxiety per say. But when I joined The Navy I tried really hard to fit in and make the best of it. I wore the uniform with pride, I showed up for watch 15 minutes early all through deployments and after I got out.. I had no idea who I was anymore. For three years I was told what to wear how to act. And kept on my toes and alert at all times because of terrorist. Coming home was a major adjustment. I had to find myself again. On top of that I had taken care of my father too. It had taken years. Anxiety played a part as well. But I found what the triggers were and fought back. Don’t let the anxiety win! You got this René! I know you can do it!

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